Picky Eating and Autism

I just saw a meme of a skeleton sitting at a table with a plate in front of it. The words said something like “sure, he’ll eat when he’s hungry.” If you have a child who is a picky eater, you’ve heard it all.

He will eat when he’s hungry.

I would never let my child only eat chicken nuggets.

She won’t know there are onions in the casserole.

He won’t really gag if he eats pudding.

She is just messing with you. Make her sit till she eats.

Or the popular – take a bite!

I’ve heard them all, too. Casey likes almost everything, but what she doesn’t like will make her gag if she tries a bite. I’ve seen her.

Rob is pickier, but his has as much to do with texture as anything else. He can’t stand touching gooey things and foods such as pudding will make him gag.

He knows it so he doesn’t touch foods that will make him sick. I’m lucky that, even though he is picky, he eats a wide variety of foods.

He loves most meats, but only ham lunch meat. He eats fruits and vegetables. He is choosy about snacks and doesn’t like most candy.

It’s hard for some people to understand that sensory issues really affect what people with autism can eat. It’s not just the taste – it’s smell and texture, too. For some people, color plays a huge part, too.

And it’s really hard for people who show their love by cooking delicious meals only to have someone refuse to eat it. Trust me – your person with autism will know if you sneak a veggie into a casserole. (And many won’t touch casseroles because everything is all mixed up and might not be “safe” enough to eat).

Until I learned about autism, I thought like that. Sooner or later, the kid will eat. Autism was a hard and fast lesson in what is “safe” to eat. Chicken nuggets. Fries. Crackers. Cheese pizza. Mac and cheese.

I know how frustrating it is to want your child to try new things, but is it really that big of a deal? Is this a battle you want to have every single night forever? Why does it matter if your person with autism eats chicken nuggets while everyone else eats the fancier meal? It’s just not a battle worth fighting to me.

Rob wasn’t as picky when he was little. He used to love pizza and spaghetti and chili, but won’t touch any of it now. I’m really not sure why – it’s like a switched got flipped and he won’t touch any of it. It’s really not a big deal to me. He eats plenty of different things and I stock up on what he “needs” to have. It’s no different than buying my favorite foods. 🙂

I urge you to not take it personally if your person with autism won’t eat what you make. It’s nothing to do with you – it’s what their body is telling them. Maybe someday they will be more willing to try new foods. Rob started a few years ago and has made huge steps in what he’ll taste. Gooey foods are a definite no, but he’s willing to stick his tongue in some of those. Baby steps! And I’m good with that!

If you want to learn more about sensory issues, check out our book, Autism, Apples & Kool-Aid, available here.